Feelings

So here we are three days after getting our very first positive on a pregnancy test. I still just don't know how to feel about it all I guess I don't know if its real or not still and so i'm just being cautious with my feelings. I started to spot this really gross dark brown/reddish color stuff it has me pretty freaked out but everything I have read said this is mostly leftover blood from implantation gosh I hope so I have never ever been pregnant before so I don't know what is going on I hope its all good though. I have been taking tests everyday glad its not just me lol but they have been getting darker so I hope that is a good thing. I go Tuesday to get my first beta done I just pray its going to be good news. I still don't feel many symptoms other then really sore boobs. I always thought when I got a positive I would be so happy and excited and while I am i'm more gaurded then anything i'm not even sure why I know most first time moms just go crazy after seeing that positive sign maybe I have read too many sad stories and blogs I am not naive about it at all and that kind of sucks because i'm scared mostly maybe this is normal maybe its because if something were to happen we cant just have sex and try again were back where we started and that is hard to think about. I have not had any cramping really just mostly spotting when I use the bathroom apparently its more common with IVF pregnancy's I just don't know for now i'm just going to take it easy and hope for the best. I am so grateful to have come this far further then we have ever made it before I do feel lucky to be seeing that positive test I really do.